I am sad today...

Widow

Origin: bef. 900; (n.) ME wid(e)we, OE widuwe, wydewe; c. G Witwe, Gothwiduwo, L vidua (fem. of viduus bereaved), Skt vidhavā widow; (v.) ME, deriv. of the n.;

def. A women whose husband has died and who has not yet remarried.

What a narrow definition for something so consuming. It is interesting to me to note that this definition says who has "not yet" remarried. Somehow thinking about having another person in my life is the farthest thing from my mind and it seems strange to me that it should be part of the definition of what I have now become. I do not like my new status as a widow. It is lonely and everything seems to be going by me in slow motion. Little things make me well up like a fountain and they are usually the silliest things imaginable. Like walking through the aisle at the market and seeing Dave's favorite cereal on the shelf or finding a pair of his dirty socks in the laundry hamper. Part of me wishes that he wasn't every place I look but mostly I am terrified that I will stop seeing him everywhere.

I thought that the nights would be the hardest but strangely that has not been the case. At night, in our bed, I am comforted with thoughts of all the nights he lay beside me there and sleep comes easily to me. He became so fragile near the end that it was impossible to give him more than a cursory hug or to just stroke his arm and I think I miss not having one of his hugs most of all. He used to enfold me in those impossibly long arms of his and he could encircle me almost completely. I never felt safer or more secure than when he did that. I take my comfort in knowing that in the years Dave and I were together we shared enough hugs, pats, squeezes, touches and more than most people have in their entire lifetime. Once Dave said that we had shared enough love that if we stopped right at that moment and never touched again, what we had already had would last the rest of our lifetime and into the next. How could he have known those words would be true?

Writing on this blog about my life with Dave is how I am getting by right now and I thank those of you who follow it for indulging me. The title says that it is about my life on an organic farm and this is the part of life that has to be dealt with. Dave and I believed strongly in the natural order of things, in the circle of life. How can I profess to have believed if I do not accept that death is a necessary part of that circle. Nobody lives forever, as much as you might want them to. Dave just completed his circle ahead of me and I hope he is waiting for me on the other side.

Last week was the "week that was".

Farmer Dave

After 16 incredible, amazing years with the man that I loved almost beyond reason, my sweet, organic life changed last week, in the blink of an eye. Dave left this world behind last Tuesday and now I miss him more than I imagined possible. When we finally resigned ourselves to the fact that he wasn't ever going to get better and that his time was growing short, I tried to imagine how it was going to be without him, simply to prepare myself for the inevitable. When the time actually came, it was 1000 times harder than anything I was capable of conceiving.

While you try to prepare yourself for the eventuality of a death, especially when someone is fighting a disease as sinister as cancer, nothing, and I mean N-O-T-H-I-N-G, prepares you for that moment when you realize that this person you knew and loved is really and truly gone. It is like something grabs your chest and squeezes the life out of you, too. It is like a wave of unimaginable agony that strikes you powerless and paralyzed. You can't breathe, you can't move, you can't even think. All you can do is be held in the grasp of that moment while the world stops around just you and everything else keeps moving. When that grip suddenly is let go, it feels like the entire bottom of the universe has dropped away and left you suspended, beyond space and time. And then, the shockwave of reality hits you and you are forever changed.

I have thought long, hard and much about my life with Dave and I keep coming back to the same thing. We loved each other without reserve, without boundaries, without most of the trappings that come with a marriage sometimes. We never focused on careers, we had both done that in the lives we lived before we met. Instead, we decided to forgo the pursuit of happiness through things as artificial and man created as money, position and power because those things are worthless in the end. We vowed to focus all of our energies on the power of love, both between each other and for Mother Earth and her children.

In all our years together, we never quarreled (of course, we differed in opinion sometimes but how could we use our individual strengths if we didn't express them?), spent less that 2 dozen nights apart, expressed our love for one another at every opportunity and left absolutely nothing left unsaid between us. We worked side beside for most of those 16 years, first in our store at the beach and then at the Farm for the last decade. Every effort was made to insure that we remained able to spend our time and be together as much as possible.

We tried to guide and support each other in everything we did but Dave was always the better teacher. The lessons he taught me have shaped the person I am today. I never felt like I gave as much as he did in that regard, but he always said that I taught him what you could accomplish through the power of love. He taught me that it is okay to just be who you are, that growing as a person is necessary for one to move forward on their path toward enlightenment and that fear is the mind killer. I no longer fear many things because of Dave's lessons and that has given me great peace and serenity on many levels. His most important lesson was that I was worthy of being loved by someone like him - intelligent, wise, spiritual, amazing, kind, gentle and the most beautiful soul I have encountered in my 50+ years. That was a lesson he never tried to teach because he was too humble to think he was any of those things I mentioned.

We both truly believed that we were soul twins, joined for eternity and that comforts me greatly. I will miss him in ways I can't yet imagine. But there is so much of Dave, and who and what he was, in me now that he is with me still, in every fiber of my being and always will be there.

Namaste, my love, good journey.

Something about Dave, the Farmer

A little more somber topic here today. Dave, my husband and co-founder of the Farm is gravely ill. He has had kidney cancer since 2005 and has finally reached that stage where quality of life is paramount. He is home and in hospice care. Alert some days, others completely "gone somewhere else", he is still guiding my hand when he can but mostly he just gazes out the window from his hospital bed and looks out across the fields.

So blessed that he can watch deer and wild turkey cross from the pine woods, across the pasture and into our backyard. From his perspective in the hospital bed, he can see birds in the sky and the trees and he never misses when the local Coopers hawk flies over when he is looking out.

Some of the friends here at this page know Dave and some don't. Those of you who do know him, know him as a dedicated organic farmer. For the last decade, we have carved our little 30 acres into something that we are very proud of, with good reason. From an original tiny plot of 100 square feet to 17 of the 30 acres being under organic cultivation, we have pushed forward each year to make the Farm a success. And I don't mean a monetary success, that has never been all that important to us (if you took a look at our bank account, you would concur with that statement). Of course, we have been so very, very lucky to have had the blessing and support of both of our families, even though in the beginning they were a little skeptical of what we were trying to do.

Originally, we didn't intend for the Farm to make our living. It was a labor of love for both of us and a part of a spiritual journey we embarked on a long time ago. Being able to dedicate so much of our lives to this labor is the culmination of our belief in something greater than ourselves and the manifestation of that belief into something tangible. There is no greater faith that to put a tiny seed in the ground and believe that it will eventually be fruitful and that it will feed the soul as well as the body. We experience that manifestation of our faith every single day and gives our lives tremendous meaning. How can you not believe in something greater than yourself when you see the miracles of Nature happen before your eyes every single day?

Setting an example for others to follow has always been something that we strove for at the Farm. Passing along the knowledge and experiences that we gained, too, has been something equally important. If one lives their life dedicated to their principles, that example can be an inspiration for others to follow. We have tried to make that the main tenet of our philosophies about organics, sustainability, living a life of voluntary simplicity.

From the day we met, we have done what we could to make sure that we spent as much time together as possible. Dave is truly my soulmate and when we are apart it feels like something is missing in myself. Not longing, like when you miss someone when they are gone, but just a little feeling in the background that something is not quite as it should be. Since establishing this farm, every day, we have worked together, side by side, toe to toe, on nearly everything we have done. It has made our relationship strong and unbreakable.

Love is too small a word to describe what Dave and I share. His illness has given me pause to reflect on many of the things I have expressed here in this writing. My heartache at the possibility of losing him was overwhelming me recently, until I decided to stop focusing on what is to come and reflect on what has been and how we came to be at this place where we are now. It has made me realize that there will be no regrets for things undone between us. We have never failed to express everything we felt about each other, with both our words and deeds, left nothing unsaid. I know that when he is gone, I will feel the weight of the world on my shoulders but I also know I will be lifted to the Heavens knowing that someone like Dave so loved someone like me and never, ever failed to make me feel completely safe and loved for as long as I have known him.

Learning how to bend with the wind, instead of fighting to make it do what we chose to have it do is something that every true organic farmer learns quickly. That bending leads one to find balance and harmony. Harmony leads to peace. And peace and love are what matter in the end.

I will continue to operate New Moon Farm Organics, no matter what happens in the future. It is Dave's legacy, what he leaves behind as a testament to his dedication and love of what we do here. I intend to continue our dreams and follow the path. He may not continue to walk with me in this realm, but he will always walk at my side, no matter where the path takes me.

Namaste my friends.

FARMIN-ISTAS UNITE!

It is that time of the year. Things are bursting at the seams with life! You can smell it on the air. The trees are covered with tiny leaf buds, the hens are laying again, the weeds are coming up faster than the planted seeds and the weather can't decide whether to be warm, windy, cold or wet. I LOVE Spring in the South!!!

Right now, I have so many irons in the fire, I need another arm or two to juggle them. I am working the farm alone right now but getting ready to put out the call for volunteers via my "VOLUNTEER WISH LIST". This is a page I put up on my website that lists all the things I need help with and then anyone with a couple of hours to spare can pick something they are comfortable helping with and take it from there. We start our formal "Hands Across the Table" crop-share/ intern program in May and I am working on the details of that to send out to the interested participants.

Another thing I am very excited about is my summer "Farmin-istas" seminar series starting in June. Every other weekend this summer, I plan on offering an educational seminar directed at female farmers (or "farm femmes" as I have christened them). Farming has always had the connotation of being a bastion of the "good ole' boy" network and that is quite true in some areas of agriculture, even though women have long worked beside of husbands, fathers, brothers doing just about any farm chore as the men. The number of women who own, operate or manage farms has grown significantly since the last census and I expect the numbers will have grown considerably after this one. I want and need to confer and conflab with other women who do what I do. We have our own ways of doing things, we think differently that our male counterparts and we can have a very different set of obstacles in the way of our progress. It is time for FARMIN-ISTAS to UNITE! I am making it my personal mission to get this ball rolling in my area this year. Watch for more info as it unfolds.

Getting back to the blog

Wow! It has been another one of those week, months, years. Hubby has been in the hospital for the last week and just got him home. I pray that nobody has to go through what we are going through, but I know that as long as there is no cure for cancer, that won't happen. Taking each day as it comes is all you can do. My sweet Farmer is beyond being cured and now we are in palliative care. Thanks to all the people who have been so kind to us in the past and the present and to those I know will be kind in the future. While we are still looking at a relatively long road, it is just so hard to come to terms with your whole life changing in ways you never imagined it would. But I have learned that the fears I had about my ability to care and comfort for someone this intensely have been assuaged and I now know that the depth of love truly does conquer all.

Now that we are past this latest hurdle, we are ready to get cranking on the gardens. Already have tons of stuff coming up in the greenhouse, so we are still on track...just a couple of weeks behind but that is due to the wet, cold weather. Now that it is warming up some, things will change quickly. I am pretty much able to man the helm here at the Farm and with the help of our volunteers, it all goes very well. The Farmer is still the General, he is just confined to quarters at the present.

Thanks to everyone who has expressed their willingness and desire to be involved with our farm this year. I am looking forward to passing the torch of organic knowledge onto anyone who wants to roll up their sleeves and get down and dirty with me. I will be posting some new information about volunteer/apprentice/internship opportunities here very soon, so watch for that.

If you missed the new slide show at the website check it out! www.newmoonfarmorganic.com

and look for the link. I have about 320+ pictures that will take you on a journey through our last 10 years. We are very proud of what we do and want to share it with anyone and everyone!!!!

Organic vs. Non-organic Produce

Humans have been growing produce organically for thousands of years. Today, the USDA has strict regulations governing the production of organic produce. In general, the use of genetically engineered seeds and methods, chemicals or radiation as preservatives, and chemically based fertilizers and pesticides are not allowed. Organic agricultural methods are more ecologically proper, sustainable, less harmful to the environment and overall are more energy efficient.

Organic produce are richer in vitamins, minerals, enzymes, trace elements and other nutrients than the fruits and vegetables produced by chemical based methods. In a recent study, antioxidant levels found in organically grown vegetables were almost 30% higher than conventional chemically enhanced vegetables.

Perhaps the most important reason to consume organic produce is that the human bodies were not designed to be constantly bombarded with chemicals and biologically altered products on a long term basis. Many of the problems associated with the non-organic foods will take years if not generations to show clear "cause and effect" consequences on our health. What we do know is that the herbicides and the pesticides used in non-organic farming are all "toxic" because that is how they were created. Obviously, the intake of toxic foods is bad for our health. The long term physiological and neurological damages done to the human health by consuming non-organic foods are numerous and very complex.

Another major health concern with the consumption of non-organic foods is the industry's wide and heavy use of antibiotics and growth hormones as supplements in animal feed. These supplements are used primarily to make the animals grow faster, bigger and less disease prone, leading to higher production yields. Numerous studies indicate that traces of these supplements remain in the food chain. It is not unreasonable to assume that the infusion of these biological and chemical agents into the food chain may be partially responsible for human obesity and other serious and growing health problems such as diabetes, coronary illnesses, autism, etc., etc.

Organic produce and food products have become more and more mainstream.They are more available in supermarkets. However, farmer's markets, smaller organic health food stores and community supported agriculture (CSA) are still more reliable outlets for organic produce and of course, local food.

Back to the Blog

I have been a blogslacker (I made that word up...) lately but I have a good excuse. I do our website myself and am an old dinosaur when it comes to writing the code for the site. It takes me forever because I don't use a program for it and I have to tweak every page until I like it and that can take me days just to finish one section. While our website is pretty "folksy" and homemade, it takes a lot of work to make it look that way. There is a new 300+ photo album that has pictures from our 10 years here. The other new page is the 2010 Crop List and you can go there from here . That page is the one that took forever because I had to look through about 1000 photos to find the right ones since it has pictures of each veggie, most of which were taken of stuff harvested here at the Farm. I had to use stock photos for a couple of things, but noted that by the pics, so there is no confusion. Don't want to mislead.

And speaking of misleading, I recently looked at a couple of "local produce buying club" websites that deliver in this area. I am sorry to be my usual cynical self, but if you are buying a basket of produce and it has avocados, bananas or oranges in it, it ain't "local", at least by my definition. I guess they mean that the buying club is local, not the produce, but that is misleading. Guess the argument could be made that any assumption made by the consumer is not the fault of the operator. Of course, I have canvassed grocery store produce managers about their definition of local and have come to the conclusion that to some people "local" means grown on Planet Earth. Personally, I try to keep my "local" sphere within a 50 miles range, just because there is a great dairy that I buy cheese from and it is just about 50 miles from me. Other than that, more than 20 miles away makes me twitch.

NEW MOON FARMER COULD USE YOUR HELP

Support New Moon Farm Organics by participating in our

MARKET

DISCOUNT CARD PROGRAM

We have issued 100 "I SUPPORT NEW MOON FARM" discount cards,which will sell for $10 each.
The card will entitle the holder to a 10% discount on produce purchases for the entire 2010 market season
at the Davidson Farmer's market and/or

at any other farmer's market we attend in 2010.

The card can be used as a one time $20.00 discount toward

a 12 week membership in our

2010 CSA (click this link for CSA info)

Why the fundraiser?

Dave and I are passionate organic farmers, although it isn't a profession that pays a whole lot. Of course, we don't do it just for the money. There is something deeper than I can't quite explain with mere words, that keeps us at this year after year. We consider it our "calling", a deep and spiritual need to express our caring for this world by doing something concrete to demonstrate that concern. For us, it has never been about money. Unfortunately, however, we live in a world where money rules.

With the tremendous amount of medical and other bills related to Dave's cancer, we have almost completely exhausted our savings. While we now have coverage for almost everything that Dave requires, for the first four months of his illness nothing was covered, because his cancer was a pre-existing condition. We have a mountain of medical bills to prove it.

We are presently in a situation where we simply need to ask our friends and neighbors for a little help. Like most very independent people, it is hard to ask for a handout and that is not the case now. We always budget for our off season months, including unplanned and emergency expenses. This year it was one unplanned expense after another and now our "emergency fund" is almost gone.

Because farming is seasonal, we won't have any regular stream of funds coming in until late March or April and so we need to raise a bit of capital between now and then. To do so, we decided that a little fund raiser might be the solution to get us over this rough financial patch. The post at the beginning of this blog gives the simple details. Even though the button says "DONATE" this is actually more of a "special offer". Of course, any donation, however small, would be greatly appreciated.

*******************************

This article is posted on one of my other blogs, but I thought it was a good topic for this one, too. The original post was sparked by an article I read about how Dean Foods "quietly removed" the word organic from the label of its line of Silk Soy products. I identified with the headline because I was a victim of exactly what the article was written about. (The link on this blog is listed at the menu on the right but it won't stay up forever so you can read the article at http://www.star-telegram.com/local/story/1746193.html for as long as it stays posted there. If it is removed, look at www.star-telegram.com for articles written by By BARRY SHLACHTER barry@star-telegram.com )

Because I try to stay 90-95% organic in my choices about food, cosmetics, etc. I try alot of products, always looking for quality and good value. I stay away from anything organic from China, sadly because I just don't trust them yet. Ditto for anything that is not labeled with what I consider to be a legitimate organic certifying body for foreign goods. There are a lot of non-domestic "organic" products finding their way onto our supermarket shelves because frankly, there is not enough organic agriculture, etc. in the U.S. to keep up with the demand. Even though conventional agriculture continually tries to discredit organics, it is still far and away, even counting in the cheaters, way safer and healthier food. Safer for not just people but for the whole planet.

Anyway, it is what I believe, it is my life and I am relentless in my search for quality products. Oh, by the way, did I mention that I own an organic farm and I actually grow most of my own food, make my own cosmetics and generally do not routinely shop at the supermarket for anything except for things I can't produce myself. Soy milk is one of those things. So, now for the reason for this information and how it relates to soy products.

I don't do dairy. I am allergic to milk - not lactose intolerant- but truly allergic, with hives, stomach upset, everything you'd expect with an allergy. I passed this allergy onto my kids, although mine is more severe. Bottom line is that soy and alternatives to milk products has been a way of life for us. Soy has always been my product of choice. I drink it, cook with it, put it on my cereal. I never developed a taste goat milk and while I have been known to make my own almond milk, by the time I made enough for our usage, it would cost me a fortune so I stick with soy.

In my search for product I liked, I settled on Silk Organic Soy Milk. It has passed all my taste tests and I just like the product line. I have been buying it for years. White Wave, the company who produces Silk, is owned by Dean Foods and they have about 3/4 of the market share of these products anyway but it is a superior product, in my opinion. Buying these products from this conglomerate is one of the compromises that I make in my food choices. I am not buying local, I am not buying from a small family company and that is a bit of a sticking point, I admit. My conscience also tells me that this corporate giant (Dean) is not to be totally trusted but since I know that going in, it is my free choice to buy their products. For some reason that makes me feel a little better, knowing that they are not screwing me over, without my knowledge. I am allowing them to do it and that I think is called consent.

Recently, however, they confirmed my belief in the "not to be trusted" scenario. They quietly deleted the word "ORGANIC" from the label of most their products. No change was made at all to the carton but the much reduced organic line (I have only seen 2 products) is now in completely new and different green cartons. So if stocked on the same shelves, the organic product would stand out and that was the good news.

The bad news, unfortunately,that is not what happened. What did happen is that they didn't bother to tell retailers about the changes, so the retailers, in turn, continued get the same products they had been getting. Kind of a grocery store version of "don't ask, don't tell", much like what is going on with the unlabeled genetically engineered foods on the grocer's shelves.

Supermarkets don't work like they did 10-15 years ago, when the section manager actually made the decisions about products. Now the vendors just come in, place product and whatever they deem to be selling is what ends up on your grocers shelves. That is why there is such a limited selection of organic products in many of our local markets. There is no one who really knows anything about these products making any decisions. Decisions are made based on numbers on a page, not on customer demand. The numbers are calculates on sales in the store but if the store has no product to sell, how can those numbers reflect what customers might actually want. And as complacent consumers, we just accept that as the way it is.

When someone has been buying the exact same product, week after week, for several years, it is human nature to stop reading the label. Because nothing else changed on the cartons of Silk Soy, only the removal of the word organic, I didn't even notice that it wasn't there, until I got home from the market one day. For some reason, I was looking at the back of the carton and I noticed that the green "CERTIFIED ORGANIC" label was missing. Imagine my chagrin, because I have no idea how long it had not been there. I was furious to say the least. AND not only was the word "ORGANIC" removed, there is no disclaimer anywhere on the latest carton I purchased that says that it is made from non-GMO soybeans, which only incited my ire further. (To be fair in this tirade, that issue has since been corrected and the cartons now say that Silk is made with non-GMO soybeans grown domestically).

I immediately got online and looked up Silk Soy and discovered several articles written by other people who were just as angry as myself. I did find information about the much reduced organic line now offered by Silk but that hardly assuages my disgust for this company and their tactics. While I realize that the onus of responsibility for knowing what I am purchasing falls on me and only me, but this company's obvious "sneak attack" on one of their own organic products is unconscionable in my universe. Yes, the new cartons are bright green, easily discernible from the non-organic products, IF they are stocked on the shelves. It was a sneaky bait and switch as far as I am concerned but I hate to admit that I was one of those people who was duped by all this.

I have not stopped buying the non-organic Silk Soy products, because I can't find anything from the organic line at any of my limited sources. A couple of the local markets have their own lines of organic soy products now and the label says they are domestically grown, certified organic (non-GMO), although they are not as good as Silk Soy. I guess, at least for now, I will have to trust that the National Organic Program is doing its job. The NOP has the strictest organic guidelines on the planet at this point in time, but with lobbyists and politicians having a say in what happens at the USDA, who knows how long that will stay true.

Getting ready for the 2010 season

I am kind of relishing the cold wet weather that has been back for the last two days because I don't have to feel so guilty about wanting to stay in the house. Having a couple of warm days to work outside was nice, I guess, but it is supposed to be cold this time of year and I simply longed to be inside, piddling around the kitchen or working on my cookbook. I don't get much time like this so it is important to me to take advantage of it while I can.

I did a bit of work in the greenhouse and some other mundane outdoor chores while it was warm, but it just didn't feel right yet. I got tomatoes and a couple of other things seeded in flats, so that there will be plenty of plants to go out when it warms up in April, so that was good but overall I just wasn't into being outside yet.

Winter Wonderland

This morning I looked out my kitchen window to a veritable winter wonderland. Our backyard rolls down into a hollow and then back up a steep bank, much of which is treed with mostly old oaks and some huge poplars. Since the angle of the sun and the shade of the woods keeps out most sun this time of year, it takes a long time for any accumulation of snow to melt completely. That has given the woods a kind of jigsaw puzzle look, one of those with greyed out pieces.

The trees in my particular view out that back window are huge old oaks and a couple of grandfather poplars, so there isn't much undergrowth because these trees keep it so shady much of the year that not much grows under them. Because of that you can see much of the animal activity that occurs there. Coupled with the fact that there is an open pasture just over the rise and a thick, thick stand of planted pines on the other side of the pasture, you have the perfect place for much of our local wildlife to cross safely from one stand of trees to the other. This time of year, the outside dogs are on the back porch, warm and snuggled up in their kennels, so there is nothing to disturb the morning comings and goings of the local population of wildlife.

This morning, I watched 6 deer pass from right behind my house, into the pasture and on into the pines. They are not afraid of much this time of year and since this is a fairly protected spot for them, they linger as they pass. Deer are browsers and so curious about anything that might be edible. I watched them stop and paw at the leaves looking for some little morsel underneath. Unfortunately, today I think all they might have found was frozen solid but maybe not. Even as cold as it is, under the warmth of decaying leaves, things are sprouting and alive. Just the other day, I raked aside a pile of leaves and found several acorns with long, pink sprouts splitting their shells. There are many, many acorns in the woods and they feed a host of wildlife, from wild turkeys to the deer. Squirrels here have no fear of going hungry, even if they forget where they buried their own stashes, with the bounty available to them.

We also have several pecan trees in our backyard and the bluejays love them. There were not many pecans on the trees this year but high in the branches, the jays find the occasional nut and it is always interesting to watch them trying to crack them. I counted 9 jays on the tree just outside the window and more flying back and forth between that tree and two of the other ones. Flitting, bright blue birds on a morning as cold as this was really beautiful.

COLD! COLD! COLD!

Winter has come in like a lion this year. It is so cold here this morning that it felt like my eyeballs were frozen by the time I got back in from taking the dogs out. But, even though I was really, really cold, I have to say that the sunrise was worth every shiver.

There is a pretty heavy cloud layer this morning because we have another system moving into the area so the sunrise was sort of weighed down by a blanket of periwinkle blue clouds. Under that blue mantle, the sun was just coming over the horizon (what I could see anyway) radiating with a glorious blending of red, pink and gold, so that everything was bathed in this intense copper glow. There is a dense line of pine trees at the back of the field across the road and they looked like they had been dipped into rose gold. It didn't last long, but I found myself standing there, holding my breath for a bit. I was so mesmerized that I forgot that it was 14 degrees.

It is at moments like that when I have no doubts that there is something Greater than myself in the Universe and I am always humbled by those moments.

The Safe Seed Pledge

Be a responsible gardener and always look for this pledge (or something similar) when purchasing your seeds.

Agriculture and seeds provide the basis upon which our lives depend. We must protect this foundation as a safe and genetically stable source for future generations. For the benefit of all farmers, gardeners and consumers who want an alternative, we pledge that we do not knowingly buy or sell genetically engineered seeds or plants. The mechanical transfer of genetic material outside of natural reproductive methods and between genera, families or kingdoms, poses great biological risks as well as economic, political, and cultural threats. We feel that genetically engineered varieties have been insufficiently tested prior to public release. More research and testing is necessary to further assess the potential risks of genetically engineered seeds. Further, we wish to support agricultural progress that leads to healthier soils, genetically diverse agricultural ecosystems and ultimately people and communities."

THE SAFE SEED INITIATIVE

The Council for Responsible Genetics

LOCA-RAVE

The media's labeling of things puts them into a box from which there is sometimes no escape. Sometimes this labeling doesn't even mean anything. Like when some catch phrase from television or some equally spurious source starts being used so much people stop questioning the origin or even the meaning.

Every year, yet another "think tank" (see what I mean?) comes out with an annual list of top new words or most overused words, it is always astounding to me that anyone even took the time to think about it in the first place. I know that in our modern culture there is always something new that might need a specialized description, but what is wrong with stringing together some of the old words that we have stuffed into the verbal broom closet and completely forgotten about.

In 2007, the Oxford dictionary word of the year was "locavore". While I am actually in the business of growing food for others and love the idea that more and more people are interested in what I do, I just don't like that word. It sounds pretentious to me, kind of like eating local food is something new. My grandmother lived during the time when if you didn't eat local food, you went hungry, simple as that. So, why do we need a new word (locavore) to describe something that existed for the entire history of mankind until less than 100 years ago? I don't get that at all.

And while I am on the subject, when did the market become "super"? (I got most of the following from a Wikipedia article on Supermarkets.)

The concept of a self-service grocery store was developed by Clarence Saunders. His first Piggly Wiggly store opened in Memphis, Tenn., in 1916. According to the Smithsonian, the first true supermarket in the United States was opened by a former Kroger employee, Michael J. Cullen, on August 4, 1930, inside a 6,000 square foot former garage in Jamaica, Queens, New York. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Hmmm? How about some more interesting factoids:

• Supermarkets, especially big box stores, have made the survival of the smaller family-run farm stands and neighborhood markets increasingly difficult.


• Supermarkets, in general, also tend to narrow the choices of fruits and vegetables by stocking only varieties with long storage lives, thus leading to medium-term extinction of the cultivation of other varieties. There are only about 80 varieties of vegetables being cultivated on factory farms in the US. 100 years ago, when everybody ate local produce, there were probably thousands because each state, region, even community that had favorites, etc. Thank goodness the interest in heirloom vegetables, fruits, etc. has kept some of these from obliteration.


• In the US, major-brand supermarkets often demand "slotting fees" from suppliers in exchange for premium shelf space and/or better positioning (such as at eye-level, on the checkout aisle or at a shelf's "end cap"). This extra supplier cost (up to $30,000 per brand for a chain for each individual SKU) may be reflected in the cost of the products offered. Some critics have questioned the ethical and legal propriety of slotting fee payments and their effect on smaller suppliers.

So, if you aren't shopping at your local farmer's market, why not?

THE ORGANIC ORACLE SPEAKS: ORGANIC IMPOSTORS

Unfortunately, anytime there is an economic demand for a product, impostors sometimes begin to spring up at an alarming rate. This is the situation that many small certified organic farmers are encountering with more and more regularity when trying to market their goods. At farmer's markets, roadside stands, buying clubs and other venues, there are unscrupulous growers who claim to be "almost organic" or to be using "organic methods".

Many times farmers have no real clear idea of the disservice they are doing to the concepts of organic farming when they misuse the term "organic". Many of them simply do not have access to or completely comprehend the organic standards of the National Organic Program. Some of them simply do not care.

Just because you didn't spray noxious chemical pesticides on your crops in no remote way makes you an organic grower, nor does it adhere to the organic method. This system of agriculture is a synergistic partnership between the grower, the environment, combined with a deep respect and philosophical understanding of what this partnership requires. Unfortunately, it has become a marketing scheme in the last decade, instead of the principled ideals that were originally conceived.

Part of the organic method requires the support and establishment of habitat for beneficial insects, birds and other helpful creatures. It is not about controlling nature but rather finding the balance between what nature creates and working within that creation. It requires strong faith in the perfect order of all things in nature and to work with and within the natural cycles that occur. The truest principles of organic farming are not about commerce, they are about a deep and abiding love of Mother Earth and about taking our earthly stewardship responsibilities very seriously. It's really not all about the money.

TO CERTIFY OR NOT TO CERTIFY, THAT IS THE QUESTION?

There is an exemption from certification for legitimate very small organic growers. These producers are allowed to call their products organic, provided that they meet the specifications for this exemption. Part of the onus of responsibility for these non-certified organic growers is to keep the exact same paperwork and follow the exact same rules that certitied growers use. Only then is the exemption legitimate.

Ergo, the requirements to legally label a product as organic (non-certified) by falling under this exemption category, is exactly the same as a certified grower. All they are exempt from is inspection and paying for certification, which incidentally is not expensive at all. This is another common argument for not being certified that is completely bogus...most certifiers have caps on what they can charge and the USDA offers financial assistance to help with the costs of certification.

Since the other most common argument against certification among these pseudo-organic growers is that the paperwork is too burdensome for them to bother with but that is also not true.The documentation required is, if anything, an extremely useful tool that helps a farmer track his progress and have a yearly record to refer back to when planning his growing seasons. It is no more involved that keeping track of how you are managing your business. To be successful, any well managed business must keep good records, so what it the difference?

(The link below will take you to brief outline lists some of the key points that make certification of a producer/product important to anyone who eats organic food.)

Certified versus Non-Certified

CONSUMER RESPONSIBILITY

So, the only way to be certain that you are, in fact, getting what you are paying for is to ask for the grower's certification or to question their methods. It is your right to know. Organic certification is your assurance that the grower has done his or her due dilligence in order to obtain that certification. Third party certifiers for the USDA inspect farms to make sure that they are following what amounts to the strictest food growing standards in the world today. If your grower falls under the small grower's exemption, he/she should be able to explain the regulations that cover his/her operation.

And the growers are not the only ones at fault with regard to misinformation about organics. A majority of consumers don't really know exactly what they are seeking when it comes to organics and so the waters are muddied even further. Lots of consumers are really looking for fresh, local produce, not truly organic produce and this lack of distinction between two very different products feeds the cult of misinformation about organics that abounds at farmer's markets, etc.

What the Future Holds for New Moon Farm

Wow! I thought it was time to post something important to our many loyal customers and blog followers, since I know that many of you might be curious as to what is happening with Dave and myself right now, in regards to the Farm. Since many of my readers knew us during Dave's original bout with renal cancer and were so supportive at that time, it seemed that it was important to let them know that Dave is now in the fight of his life.

Back in October of 2008, a rather large tumor was discovered when it caused him to have a compression fracture of one of his lumbar vertebra. It was painful and he had extensive surgery to repair the damage but the scans he had for this event revealed that the cancer was back in several spots and he had moved into Stage IV of this dreadful disease. Treatment options are extremely limited and with rather small rates of success for the ones that do exist. But, most of them were not available at all in 2005 when he was originally diagnosed and had his kidney removed, so at least we have some small glimmer of hope for a miracle and are thankful for that.

Throughout this ordeal of the last nearly 5 years, we have never wavered from our pledge to our friends and customers to provide them with the best and healthiest food we could possible grow. Even when he could hardly stand for the pain, he insisted that crops had to get into the ground and weeds had to be hoed. This year, we struggled but with the help of many wonderful and generous volunteers, we managed to have a pretty good season. Nothing like in the past, but satisfactory anyway.

One of the other reasons I am posting this is because we mostly know many of our followers through the Farm and the Farmer's markets we have attended over the last 10 years. Some of them we have seen in recent years, but some of them not at all but the occasional email lets me know they still follow the blog and check out the website. Everybody expresses their concern but nobody ever asks the hard questions, so I thought I would answer them anyway.

Because of the seriousness of Dave's illness, there is always the possibility that we will no longer be able to operate New Moon Farm Organics. That is the reality of it. I think that a personal explanation is in order. Rumor always swirls around events that are not explained adequately and I simply do not want any misinformation about our Farm to be out there in the world. Once those kinds of things hit the air, it is hard to call them back. No matter whether there is a shred of truth or not, people sometimes choose to believe what they hear without ever checking the facts and I want them out there. (I am sure that there was plenty of speculation about why we stopped coming to Charlotte Farmer's Market, when the simple fact is that we have a much better and more lucrative market, 15 minutes from the Farm. Simple as that.) If, and I do stress IF, we are no longer able to continue farming, it will be the absolute last resort we have and it will be because of Dave's health. No other reason.

What 2010 holds is anybody's guess but we plan on pressing ahead with doing the thing we love best....growing things and going to our farmer's market. We are looking to that end for 2010, also and will be making some adjustments to how we do things to accommodate the situation. I am neither as strong and agile or as intuitive about growing things as Dave, but I can hold my own. I am looking forward to getting into a couple of new areas, which we have not been able squeeze in for the last few years. By reducing the size of our CSA to a manageable number and time frame, I foresee that it will be a good year in 2010. The first segment of CSA will be just for spring and I am looking forward to meeting a whole new crop of families to provide with awesome food! There are a couple of dedicated folks that have expressed an interest in helping out for the entire season next year and I hope that comes to fruition. And we will again be offering our "Hands Across the Table" work for food program in 2010.

Blessings and gratitude to each and every one of our customers. You have all been a part of our success over the last 10 years and we want everyone to know how much we have appreciated all the support we received over the years. Come see us at the Davidson Farmer's Market this summer. We'd love to see you!

Happy holidays and Merry Christmas to all!

Suzanne and Dave
New Moon Farm Organics

Wrote this a while back and never published it...may still be relevant

The title of this blog is "Simply Sustainable - My Life on an Organic Farm". It mostly talks about the ups and downs of living and working as a farmer. But I wasn't always a farmer. In fact, my previous incarnation was about as far from farmer as you can get. I worked in the financial services industry for over 25 years....securities and commodity brokerage, to be specific.

My epiphany that maybe that industry wasn't where I needed to be came to me back in 1992 and it took me two years to shake myself loose from it and "retire" from my long career there. I have never looked back, although sometimes I do miss the money. Of course, that only lasts for about 30 seconds because my old life always flashes before my eyes and brings me back to reality because the truth of it is that I am not sure that I would have survived another year in that business, much less the 15 years since my departure.


That previous life does, however, give me a unique perspective on the present state of the economy, the stock market and the rest of the world. It gave the the courage to change things in my life and not to accept the status quo. Purposely, I have distanced myself from the reality that most people live in daily (9 to 5 job, big mortgage payment, credit card debt, etc.). It may seem that I gave up a lot, by today's standards of success, to get to the place I am in my present life. The money, the house, the car, the travel abroad...none of it really ended up meaning much after all, once it was gone. For a while, it was kind of like an out of body experience, but when I settled back down to earth, it was all good. Don't get me wrong. I am grateful for the opportunities I had to visit other places in the world. I am glad that I had the experience of living the so-called "good life", because it gave me a reference point. I think of the life that I live now as the "sweet life" and so much better than good.

Like anybody else, my life is far from perfect. But it is what makes me happy and makes my life relevant. I have truly never been happier, in my adult life. My work has meaning to me and I know that I am doing something good for myself, for other people and for my little corner of the world.

Of course, I would not be honest if I didn't give a lot of credit to the people around me who have supported and loved me no matter how radical or strange my choices may have seemed to them. And I certainly could not have reached this level of satisfaction in my life without having my best friend by my side every step of the way. Sometimes, there are people who come into you life that have such a profound effect. If you have the wisdom and openess to accept what they bring to you, it can change your life forever.

I don't want to sound cliche, because I truly believe what I am about to say, but there is no other way to say it. Opening yourself up to the endless possibilities of the Universe is the most important step anyone can take to having their best life ever. We are only given one life at a time to live, so make this one count. In the end, it really is all about the journey.

Incredible Photography to See

Anyone who has followed this blog for a while knows that I am nutty about my beneficial insects and reluctantly enamored of even the not so beneficial ones. As I am out in the field, I get to observe up close, a tiny universe that many people never get to see. The life and activity in, under, around and between growing plants is a wonder to behold and I am in awe of it. Getting down and dirty has a whole different meaning for me that lots of folks although once in a while, I find someone who shares my wonderment.

This photo gallery (link follows), which I ran across this morning looking for something else, belongs to an epic talent. His pictures show the incredible beauty of these humble creatures that we most often take for granted. ( Yes, we all know that butterflies are beautiful but then they were always showoffs.) These pictures are sublime in their power. Take a look and you'll see what I mean.

Thomas Shahan Photography

If you click on the individual thumbnails, there is commentary and more pictures that follow each one.

Farm Daze

This has been about the most hectic week I have spent in quite a while. Last Saturday, we had our last CSA pick up of the season (we go on for a really long time), as well as our regular winter Farmer's Market in Davidson. That means I got to pick all day Friday and it was COLD! I have to get down on my knees to pick lettuce and other baby sized greens, and since the ground was still wet from the rain just a couple of days prior, I was damp and muddy in no time. Only thing that kept that day from being totally miserable is that the greens I was picking were so beautiful, it was easy to focus on them and kind of meditate my way thru this chore.

Because we were trying to get the last CSA pick up arranged at a time that everyone could have some stuff for Thanksgiving from the Farm, I scheduled the last pick up for the Tuesday groups to be on Monday, to accommodate travelers, etc. That means I had to pick on Sunday, which I don't ordinarily do, but this time it was necessary. Problem was that it rained most of the day and it was only about 50 degrees. I nearly froze!!! Hypothermia is possible in 50 degree water and I might has well have been in that situation. Once I was done and came into the house, it took me hours to warm up, even with a wool blankie tucked around my feet and some serious Chai Tea.

On Monday, I went out twice to do CSA pick ups, one in Huntersville and one in Charlotte, so Tuesday was mostly an all day thing. I left my house around 8 am and got in for the night around 7 pm. It was misty, moisty, not so cold so I was able to sit in my car, waiting on members to pick up and read the better part of a Belva Plain novel. I don't ordinarily read that kind of novel, but it was the only thing I had in the car with me, since I forgot my bookbag in my rush to get out the door Monday morning.

Tuesday, I spend the entire day (8am until 7pm, again...) at doctor's appointments with The Farmer. PET scans, CT, MRI and then on to the doctor to have them read and to talk about how things are going with The Farmer's cancer treatment. Some problems showed up and we have to go back next week for another indepth consult and more tests.

On Wednesday, I marketed, cleaned up some and worked on prep for Thanksgiving dinner. Mostly I ended up running errands because I forget how hectic things get off the Farm sometimes, especially around holidays and it took 4 times as long to do everything from go to the bank to picking up chicken feed. It was nice, too, in a way, because everybody was friendly and wanted to chat instead of the usual blank faced stares and/or non-committal comments I often notice. I am not really down with Thanksgiving in the spirit it was created but I do love it when my fellow citizens of the planet are imbued with the holiday spirit. Seems like they are a little kinder, a little more thoughtful and a little more aware of other people. Although it sounds cliche, of course, I wish it could be like this 24/7, 365(6). Maybe the world wouldn't be in such a state.

Thursday was the holiday so that doesn't need much discussion. It was nice to be with the family and the dinner was excellent. Wish everybody could have been there, but we'll get the rest of them at Christmas.

Friday, The Farmer has a nosebleed that started Thursday night and wouldn't stop, so we spent most of yesterday (it is Saturday as I am typing this)in the emergency room at the local hospital. The nosebleed thing is not related to the cancer or its treatment in anyway, but is just adds a lot of misery to an already uncomfortable situation. The poor doctor on call at the ER was alone, except for the nursing staff, and he was running ragged. Kudos to him for being the doctor who worked yesterday. There had been two relative serious auto accidents earlier in the a.m. and he had dealt with that as well as the usual "day after eating bad food" customers in the ER (remember, not everybody is a good cook) as well as some people who were just plain sick.

Anyway, we got the nosebleed taken care of and have an appt. to get more treatment on that on Monday, so I am hoping that the rest of today and tomorrow proves to be a little more restful because besides taking The Farmer to the ENT on Monday, I have a meeting at 1pm, and getting my windshield replaced on my car in the afternoon. I neglected to mention that on Monday last, while sitting and waiting on my CSA members, a big truck flew by and popped a big rock onto my windshield and it cracked all over...can't be repaired, has to be replaced.

So, that was my week last week...thought it would be good to let you all know that life on the Farm is not always as peaceful and idyllic as it might seem, although if you notice from this post, all the chaos happened off the Farm....

Simply Thankful

What a life! Every day I thank the stars that I am able to live this life I have. Even when adversity is thrown my way, I always have something to be thankful for. I sincerely wish that everyone could experience this way of living.

I go to bed when I am tired and get up when I am ready. I almost never fail to fall asleep soon as my head hits the pillow. Stress happens, but not anything that I can't handle. The time clock I punch is regulated by sunrise and sunset. I breath clean country air (except for when the neighboring dairy farm cleans their barn or the manure guys bring a load in...but that just smells like reality to me). I drink water from a well that is 400+ feet deep and it comes up cold and sweet, like God intended. You can't get water like that in a bottle. I eat mostly organic food that I mostly grow myself. I preserve summer harvests to enjoy in the cold of winter, although we usually have something growing year round! When it is time for dinner, I take my picking basket and head outside to peruse the "aisles" of my personal grocery. I can bake my own bread, make my own apple butter or strawberry jam to go with it. I hang my clothes outside on a line and they come in smelling like sunshine and fresh air, instead of fabric softener. I live with someone whom I love more than words, who makes me laugh and treats me like a princess.

I don't need much in the way of material goods which is a good thing, because I don't have a lot of that anymore. Yet I feel richer than any king because after 25 years of chasing success in a career that was took too much of my life away from me and my family, I finally realized that you really can't buy happiness. One key to realy happiness is having someone in your life who compliments you in such a way that it allows you to be secure in your relationship, to have complete trust in that other person, which in turn allows you the freedom to become "all that you can be".I don't personally know too many people who actually have that in their lives and because I do, it is one of the things that I am most and truly thankful for. I know that I am a very lucky person in that regard and never, never take it for granted in any way. I love you, honey.

I also love my parents, my brother, my kids, my grandkids, my inlaws (past and present), my friends and am thankful for each and everyone of them. I feel blessed to have been given a rare and special childhood, one from which I have not a single bad memory. Thanks, Mom and Dad. I am thankful that I was lucky enough to have had all my grandparents alive until I was well into adulthood and that I have wonderful memories from each of them.

I am thankful that I have intelligence, compassion, strength and talents. I use them as wisely as I can and try to make my world a better place so that my grandchildren will inherit a world as beautiful as the one I did.

Happy Thanksgiving.